Watch out for the curve!

Have you ever been for a drive with someone that you felt the need to hold on? ... I have a friend of mine who likes speed. She especially likes driving in the snow storms. If she's reading this, she knows I'm talking about her, and those who know her; know I'm talking about her. LOL

I remember once, we had gone to our first homeschooling conference in Rothsay, NB. We were coming back from lunch, and she was talking to her DH on the cell phone. I recognized the road she had to turn on and noticed that she was not going to turn there. I softly said, "you need to turn here." so she quickly, (she has good reflexes), turned and I held on for my dear life. We still laugh about it now. Ya... I say still because, we laughed then too!

I've been learning to not have an anxious heart. Growing to a place where I can be content in whatever state I am. Being at peace with not being in control. Sounds good eh? Well, it's been a learning "curve" and I don't find it funny at all.

Crazy isn't it? My friend had no problem accepting my direction; better late than never.... yikes...scary in that case...lol, but she rolled with the punch and we laughed about it no matter how scary it was. Why can't we do that in life lessons?

What am I talking about?

I had another "melt down" yesterday. It was much smaller than the other two times and I went to the ones I offended to say sorry.

This might sound so crazy to some of you, but for me, this is my present life lesson.

In our living conditions, we have no running water because we are still in the RV and the hose froze. The RV toilet is frozen so we have the "chapeau" and the indoor toilet has a heater beside it so the water won't freeze and we'll not be able to flush it... it all sounds surreal and quite comical doesn't it. Well, because the reservoirs are frozen in the RV, I need to wash the dishes (which the water has the boil on the stove first) in a plastic container so that the water will not accumulate and bust the reservoir. That's when I lost it. I felt so controlled by my circumstance, the pride in me built up and exploded. Proverb 13:10, "Only by pride cometh contention: but with the well advised is wisdom." I then lost control of myself. I am ashamed, and only share this to maybe encourage someone else that they are not alone.

Although my circumstance is difficult, it was not long ago that all women faced these challenges with no hope of having indoor plumbing anytime soon. They did what they could, enjoyed their kids and didn't complain about it. How spoiled "we"'ve become.

Things ARE improving on the house. Most of the house is Typared (sealed with house wrap), both new doors are in, all the windows but one are in and my husband is working on the outside steps so he can take out the almost none operational door and place the last window, then Typar the back of the house.

The men for the heating system are here today, getting all the duct work figured out and starting to place the vents. Things are progressing.

I can only say that learning to trust God on a new level has been challenging for me. He warns me of the curve in the road and unfortunately, I resist turning on THAT road because I want to go my way. I think God would just rather I turn later than never and we could laugh about the close call of being on the wrong road. He just wants me to get to the destination.

Keep laughing.

T'is what it is.

Well, my portion has been easier to accept since I've been looking through a different pair of glasses. I mean this in a spiritual way. I feel more in control of myself since I've let go of needing to have control. I know that sounds strange but that's exactly how it is.
I've realized that I don't have control on how my kids are going to turn out but, I have control of what I'm going to show them about my love for HIM. I have control over the line they will or will not cross. I have control over loving them and listening to the same story for the 5th time. I have control over not getting angry over spilt milk. (Gravity seems to be a homeschool unit study, all on it's own around here. LOL)
The less I try to control, the more control I actually have.
Asside from that, I am encouraged. Things had not been moving very fast with the house and my husband decided to take 2 weeks off to work on the house. I'm so glad. I know that things will progress more now.
We are also staying in a hotel over the weekend, since, I used my airmiles to reserve a room for my husband, the kids and me. It's my husband's birthday Saturday and he mentioned a couple of weeks ago that he was disappointed that he wouldn't have his cake at the dinningroom table. He also mentioned how he can't wait to just go take a shower when he needs to and wants to. SO.... I put those two together and we are going to a restaurant for lunch on Saturday (between both hockey tournament games) and he will get his cake at the dinningroom table plus, after the afternoon game, we will go to the hotel so we can go swimming, which my DH loves to do with the kids, take our shower, watch Hockey Night in Canada, eat popcorn etc. I'm so looking forward to give him his birthday present!
Anyway, I will post some pictures in "my photo album" soon, like I said, not much has been moving. I will be posting some beautiful pictures of the trees around our yard. It snowed, then freezing rain, then more snow and the trees are sparkling in the orange gold sunrise. Absolutely breath taking!
Keep your blessings counted.

Overwhelmed?

I've always been a positive person. Actually, I've been accused of being "an eternal positive extremist"... say that 10 times quickly.


I don't usually fret or worry because I know God's in control and I think positively. I'm not the one who will die of an ulcer. Not that you can die of that but anyway... ;)


I must although admit, that our living arrangements have been tough to "live" with at times. So far, I've had 2 melt downs, my last one being Saturday. I just got to a point where I felt emotionally and physically, claustrophobic. I felt drained and overwhelmed from the circumstances brought on by the renovation of the house. I was very emotional, irritable and snippy all day. I knew I was wrong to be this way with those I love but I let it overtake me.


On Friday, I went to a homeschooling meeting where I was able to borrow a book titled, "Calm My Anxious Heart" this is not my vocabulary but I knew that I could probably learn SOMETHING from someone else's experience. (There's that positive thinking again)


I read chapter one last night and looked at the lesson that went with it. I was amazed that although I am a positive person, I am anxious by definition. So many things I noted because it spoke to my heart for where I need to change my thought process.


It must really be something the Lord wants me to work on and have victory because our pastor spoke on just that last night. I'm so glad we go to both services, we have so much to learn!


Pastor talked about going to God's medicine cabinet, the bible, to get medicine, His direction and encouragement, to find joy. These are four points that pastor gave us through God's word.

1. Be in God's word



2. Give God thanks for the protection and provision He has given (have a thankful heart)



3. Count your blessings



4. Lead someone to Christ

In the book I'm reading, she mentions to go to God's word and memorize certain scriptures for a whole week, to pray and go through the different questions which I'm in the process of doing so I can learn to be content in whatever state I am. That's one of the scriptures I need to memorize this week. When the apostle Paul was in the prison, which is NOTHING like today's prisons, he wrote Philippians 4:11-13, "Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me."

One thing she said, which I am using to help me trust God, is constantly saying to God, "Lord, I trust the portion you are giving me."

She used the analogy of a cup of tea. Some people are a beautiful teacup with flowers and golden rim, some are a large sturdy one, some are a tiny portion cup. God created us and knows what is the portion we can handle and when He chooses to give us a certain portion in life, and we choose to complain, fret, worry or have a "melt down", we are telling God we do not agree that this is a proper portion for us.

I've decided to accept whatever portion God gives me and trust Him for today, knowing that tomorrow belongs to Him and that I need to focus on today.

Well, I've said lots, yet it has engraved itself in my mind by rehearsing it today.

I hope you are trusting God for the portion He has chosen to give you as the day progresses... even if the temporary toilet overflows... ya... my portion, I accept.

Keep trusting.

Overcoming

Well, again it's been a long time. It's difficult to find the right time to come blog since some times my kids are on it watching "Little House on the Prairie" and other times, we're not here, there other times, it's night and I don't like leaving the kids alone in the trailer while my husband is working in the house.

Things are coming along, check out the photo album and you'll see. Yesterday, the picts. aren't there yet, two friends came to tear out the walls and ceiling to the livingroom, which will be the dinning room, and the hallway. What a difference!

I have so much to share but I watched a video that my friend emailed me and cried so hard.

It's about a boy that was amputated at birth, due to cancer. He has one leg and plays all sorts of sports. Obviously, this made me think of my son, Jacob. For some of you who might not of read "Jacob's Story", it's on my blog, at the bottom of the page.

I wanted to share this video with you because I love making people cry...LOL kidding. I saw so many similarities of this boy and our son Jacob, that I knew it would show you a bit of my son at the same time.

Enjoy.

Keep overcoming.