Wednesday, February 9, 2011
How Can It Be?
Notes taken from my bible reading in Mark 15. Strange how desperately people would prefer to have a killer on the loose than have Jesus in their life. (vs. 7 & 8) Seems extreme but people are the same today, preferring their indulgence in sin instead of having Jesus in their life. Really good people make this choice too. They don't even have a reason...(vs. 14)REALLY!?(like my friend Izzy would say lol) Pilate asked "Why do you want me to crucify Him?" but they answered nothing just yelled out louder. For what reason? They will see God do miracles in people's life, change people and provide in many ways, yet they would prefer to live in fear and miserably than have Jesus in their life. Why is that? Like Pilate, I'm baffled by that. It doesn't make sens. I wonder if Cyrenian, the man who helped carry Jesus' cross, was one of those who insisted Jesus be crucified. You know, he was there with his 2 sons, Alexander and Rufus (poor kid) (vs. 21) Let's say he wasn't since it says, "who passed by, coming out of the country" (vs.21) People from everywhere knew "about" Jesus, maybe even his sons. As the soldiers "compelled" him to carry the cross, imagine what went through those boys' and father's mind. Maybe things like:
- "WHAT?! It can't be!"
- "How could anyone want THIS man to be killed?"
- "I heard the religious people were angry with Him but to kill Him? Maybe they'll kill me next."
"How can it be?"
How can it be that: - I should gain by His sufferance and death?
- people can reject Him who has done so much?
- that people blame Him for the hurt people do to others?
- I don't serve Him?
- I don't prefer Him to the pleasures of this world?
How can it be?
To see the video, click on left margin under "February", "Watch the Lamb" which is my favorite video ever. It's a perspective into Cyrenian's experience.
To see the video, click on left margin under "February", "Watch the Lamb" which is my favorite video ever. It's a perspective into Cyrenian's experience.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Food for Thought Monday
Both "Wisdom" and the "Harlot" are in the streets seeking the simple, the main differences are:
The Harlot (Proverbs 7:12)
The Harlot (Proverbs 7:12)
- loud
- stubborn
- deceitful
- etc.
- giving
- loving
- protective
- etc.
Proverbs 19:20 "Hear counsel, and receive instruction, that thou mayest be wise in thy latter end."
Thursday, February 3, 2011
The altar
Last night, since bible study was cancelled, the children and I watched North Valley Baptist Church's online archived preaching. One of my favorite preachers is Mike Johnson and he preached on September 13, 2010.
We watched and laughed but most of all, God spoke to my heart.
It's really worth watching. Just go to www.nvbc.org , then click on the archived video which is beside the photograph of the church's pastor, Bro. Trieber. Click on the link, scroll down until you see Mike Johnson or the date of Sept. 13, 2010. You can watch the whole thing but since it is the pastor and workers conference, there are many announcements and awards so we just skipped that after a while. I put the sliding cursor that shows the time in play, to the middle and the preaching started soon after.
The one major thing that spoke to me was the altar. The altar is a place of:
His message, was and is, just what I needed to hear; doing all the "right" things; what I'm "supposed" to do, but yet the fire of God is missing.
I'm "just" a stay at home mom and sometimes I get caught up in the routine of things and feel like I'm doing nothing for God. I forget to look at the big picture, "see the need" and go to my altar to ask God, after I've done all I need and supposed to do, and ask Him to send the fire.
Yesterday, I was torn if I should go to church or not because of the weather. I said to God, "Lord, I'm throwing out the fleece. If it is your will for me to stay home, have pastor cancel church." and he did. When church is cancelled, we always watch "church" online with Bro. Trieber, so we are not forsaking the assembling of the church and I always get blessed and taught something that is lacking in my life.
The other thing the Lord spoke to me about is that I need to start blogging again. He's the one who had me start but He never said to stop. I can't imagine what I can put on it that would make a big difference but He obviously thinks there is so... keep me accountable as I try to make sure that I blog at least 3 times a week, the things God is showing me and teaching me.
We watched and laughed but most of all, God spoke to my heart.
It's really worth watching. Just go to www.nvbc.org , then click on the archived video which is beside the photograph of the church's pastor, Bro. Trieber. Click on the link, scroll down until you see Mike Johnson or the date of Sept. 13, 2010. You can watch the whole thing but since it is the pastor and workers conference, there are many announcements and awards so we just skipped that after a while. I put the sliding cursor that shows the time in play, to the middle and the preaching started soon after.
The one major thing that spoke to me was the altar. The altar is a place of:
- Yieldedness
- Supplication
- Separation
His message, was and is, just what I needed to hear; doing all the "right" things; what I'm "supposed" to do, but yet the fire of God is missing.
I'm "just" a stay at home mom and sometimes I get caught up in the routine of things and feel like I'm doing nothing for God. I forget to look at the big picture, "see the need" and go to my altar to ask God, after I've done all I need and supposed to do, and ask Him to send the fire.
Yesterday, I was torn if I should go to church or not because of the weather. I said to God, "Lord, I'm throwing out the fleece. If it is your will for me to stay home, have pastor cancel church." and he did. When church is cancelled, we always watch "church" online with Bro. Trieber, so we are not forsaking the assembling of the church and I always get blessed and taught something that is lacking in my life.
The other thing the Lord spoke to me about is that I need to start blogging again. He's the one who had me start but He never said to stop. I can't imagine what I can put on it that would make a big difference but He obviously thinks there is so... keep me accountable as I try to make sure that I blog at least 3 times a week, the things God is showing me and teaching me.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Compensating or Compensated?
When Jacob was diagnosed to be born missing the right side of his pelvis, right hip and leg, they had also discovered that there was a problem with his right kidney. Once he was born, they did an ultrasound and was able to find the right kidney but told us that it was tiny and wasn't working although his left kidney was larger and was compensating for it so he could live a normal life so long as that left kidney stayed healthy.
It will be two weeks tomorrow that I had my second hearing test. She explained to me in greater detail how the hearing tests were done. She said that it is measured in decibels and that a person who hears well will measure at 15-20 decibels. During my first hearing test, as you know, I measured 40 decibels, this test, my right ear measured 60 decibels! So we are not going in the right direction as far as I'm concerned BUT God knows what He is doing. The fear of the unknown works hard on me at times but He has never left me in a place that was bad. I on the other hand have often called on Him once I've brought myself to a bad place in life so... I'm learning to let Him lead. The relevance of this story to the last is that during my test she first checked the middle ear to see if perhaps this was the problem and not the inner ear that had worsten. It was fine. She then put what looks like a head piece that a call center person wears, which the side without the "phone" was placed on the bone behind my ear. She explained that this bone sends vibrations to the inner ear and that's how they test the inner ear. She then told me that she will have a "white noise" in my left ear because when one ear can't hear something, the other ear compensates for it and will send the sound to the brain but we don't know which ear heard it; we just know that we hear a sound. It reminded me of Jacob's kidney and his situation. Later that night, I went to bed and laid on my favorite side, which happens to be on my left ear (the good one) and I believe the Lord brought back to my mind what the speech therapist had told me that day and showed me a spiritual link.
You know, the reason that Jesus told parables about different trades and health in the bible, is because the people where tradesmen and some were sick, so they understood the comparison. In my case, God took something that was familiar to me to help me be reminded and perhaps encourage others to be sensitive to this. In the body, the body being a group of saved, born again, Christians, there are some who are compensating and some who are being compensated for. I mean that some are working in the ministries, living right, being faithful, keeping their relationship with God right and renewed daily and then there are some who are being compensated for by slacking off, quitting when the going gets tough, are not faithful, are weak, negative, don't spend time with God regularly, have unconfessed sin in their life and live the way they are pleased to do, and not to please God. Those who are compensating need to be stronger, healthier and being larger in number would help but there comes a time when this stronger being (if you will) becomes tired and weak.... then what?
I'm not worried about my hearing. My left ear might become weak and perhaps the Meniere Decease might transfer into my left ear but that doesn't worry me, I can sign, talk and write plus, my Saviour is guiding the way BUT I am concerned about my family and my church and those who are not saved and need someone strong to look up to or depend on so they too can have the Saviour. It will be two weeks tomorrow that I had my second hearing test. She explained to me in greater detail how the hearing tests were done. She said that it is measured in decibels and that a person who hears well will measure at 15-20 decibels. During my first hearing test, as you know, I measured 40 decibels, this test, my right ear measured 60 decibels! So we are not going in the right direction as far as I'm concerned BUT God knows what He is doing. The fear of the unknown works hard on me at times but He has never left me in a place that was bad. I on the other hand have often called on Him once I've brought myself to a bad place in life so... I'm learning to let Him lead. The relevance of this story to the last is that during my test she first checked the middle ear to see if perhaps this was the problem and not the inner ear that had worsten. It was fine. She then put what looks like a head piece that a call center person wears, which the side without the "phone" was placed on the bone behind my ear. She explained that this bone sends vibrations to the inner ear and that's how they test the inner ear. She then told me that she will have a "white noise" in my left ear because when one ear can't hear something, the other ear compensates for it and will send the sound to the brain but we don't know which ear heard it; we just know that we hear a sound. It reminded me of Jacob's kidney and his situation. Later that night, I went to bed and laid on my favorite side, which happens to be on my left ear (the good one) and I believe the Lord brought back to my mind what the speech therapist had told me that day and showed me a spiritual link.
You know, the reason that Jesus told parables about different trades and health in the bible, is because the people where tradesmen and some were sick, so they understood the comparison. In my case, God took something that was familiar to me to help me be reminded and perhaps encourage others to be sensitive to this. In the body, the body being a group of saved, born again, Christians, there are some who are compensating and some who are being compensated for. I mean that some are working in the ministries, living right, being faithful, keeping their relationship with God right and renewed daily and then there are some who are being compensated for by slacking off, quitting when the going gets tough, are not faithful, are weak, negative, don't spend time with God regularly, have unconfessed sin in their life and live the way they are pleased to do, and not to please God. Those who are compensating need to be stronger, healthier and being larger in number would help but there comes a time when this stronger being (if you will) becomes tired and weak.... then what?
It convicted me that if I'm one of those who are being compensated for, I need to smarten up and start strengthening myself in the Lord and be a blessing and encouragement to my family and my church family, friends and even foe. If I am compensating for people who are dropping the ball, then I need to continue to surrender my health, mind and emotions to God's renewing so I don't get weak and become one to be compensated for. I know where I lack and where I'm stronger. Which are you and where? Perhaps you are not saved and feeling run down and weak. The only one who can help you is the Saviour.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Check it out!
Can you believe it??? I'm actually taking a bit of time to blog!!?? Wow!
I was reading in Mark this morning and just had to share what the Lord showed me, especially during this time of Christmas.
It's chapter 12 where Jesus tells the parable about the lord of the vineyard sending servants then his son to get the fruit of the vineyard but the husbandmen hurt and killed some of the servants but also killed the son. After Jesus tells this parable, he is questioned by people who have self serving intentions. One asks, after he smooth talks Jesus a bit, if they HAVE to pay taxes. Jesus asked them in return who's image was on the money and they said it was Ceasar's, then they were to give to Ceasar's and give to God what belongs to God. Another comes who does NOT believe in the resurrection after death. He comes with an intro to his question saying that in the Old Testament if a man died and didn't leave his wife children, she was to marry the next brother but if each brother died, having each been married to her, and left no children, who would be her husband at the resurrection. Can you hear the pompous, arrogant, selfish tone? Jesus didn't fret, He knew the scriptures so He was able to answer with confidence. He told him that there is no marriage after the Resurrection therefore no husbands and wives. (That sets a few religions right)
The next one was one of the scribes, one of the few men who could read and write, who was in charge of rewriting the Word of God (word for word). He asked Jesus which commandment was the first. Jesus said, "The first of all the commandments [is], Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God is one Lord: And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this [is] the first commandment. And the second [is] like, [namely] this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these." The scribe then congratulates Jesus for saying correctly... hee hee (imagine...) The scripture was clear that there was just one God and the scribe was confused that Jesus could be God. He was afraid to accept Jesus as his Saviour because he loved God so much and didn't want to go against what God had said. Jesus saw the sincerity in his heart. He saw that this man did not ask for selfish reasons or to entrap Jesus, he wanted to believe that Jesus was the Son of God, God in the flesh but he didn't want to go against God either. He was comparing this world and what was going on around him with scripture and God appreciated that. Jesus then said, "Thou art not far from the kingdom of God."
I have friends who do not celebrate Christmas for reasons of the history of the 25th of December. It used to be a holiday celebrated to the unknown gods and with time, they added the celebration of Jesus' birth in there. From my stand point on that is that as always, God takes the pre eminence and is exalted above all else. These friends of mine love God probably more than I do. They live for Him and have accepted the free gift of salvation (gift... wonder why we give gifts at Christmas? God continually gives us gifts but Jesus was the best gift of all, to come die in our place because He had NO sin and could pay the debt of sin for us, but we have to reach out and accept the gift of the Saviour; eternal life.)
I have other friends who do Christmas in a different way than we do. Some have trees, some don't.
I say all this for two reasons:
(If you have come to a place in your life were you understood that you are a sinner (person who sins, breaks commandments like not lying, not envying, cursing etc) and you understand and believe that Jesus Christ is the only Son of God and was born of a virgin, lived a sinless life, was tortured, crucified and died on a cross for your sins and that on the third day, as He predicted, rose again and ascended to Heaven with His body. You have confessed the first to God and accepted Jesus' payment for your sins on the cross and asked Him to forgive you and be your personal Saviour, then you are a child of God. You are saved... saved from eternity in hell after your death.)
He cleaned my life up little by little, gave me a wonderful family and is my best friend when I sometimes feel I don't have any that understand.
A- accept that you are a sinner and God is perfect without sin
B- believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and He died on the cross for your sins
C- confess your sins to Him and ask Him to come into your heart and save you.
Merry CHRISTmas
I was reading in Mark this morning and just had to share what the Lord showed me, especially during this time of Christmas.
It's chapter 12 where Jesus tells the parable about the lord of the vineyard sending servants then his son to get the fruit of the vineyard but the husbandmen hurt and killed some of the servants but also killed the son. After Jesus tells this parable, he is questioned by people who have self serving intentions. One asks, after he smooth talks Jesus a bit, if they HAVE to pay taxes. Jesus asked them in return who's image was on the money and they said it was Ceasar's, then they were to give to Ceasar's and give to God what belongs to God. Another comes who does NOT believe in the resurrection after death. He comes with an intro to his question saying that in the Old Testament if a man died and didn't leave his wife children, she was to marry the next brother but if each brother died, having each been married to her, and left no children, who would be her husband at the resurrection. Can you hear the pompous, arrogant, selfish tone? Jesus didn't fret, He knew the scriptures so He was able to answer with confidence. He told him that there is no marriage after the Resurrection therefore no husbands and wives. (That sets a few religions right)
The next one was one of the scribes, one of the few men who could read and write, who was in charge of rewriting the Word of God (word for word). He asked Jesus which commandment was the first. Jesus said, "The first of all the commandments [is], Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God is one Lord: And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this [is] the first commandment. And the second [is] like, [namely] this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these." The scribe then congratulates Jesus for saying correctly... hee hee (imagine...) The scripture was clear that there was just one God and the scribe was confused that Jesus could be God. He was afraid to accept Jesus as his Saviour because he loved God so much and didn't want to go against what God had said. Jesus saw the sincerity in his heart. He saw that this man did not ask for selfish reasons or to entrap Jesus, he wanted to believe that Jesus was the Son of God, God in the flesh but he didn't want to go against God either. He was comparing this world and what was going on around him with scripture and God appreciated that. Jesus then said, "Thou art not far from the kingdom of God."
I have friends who do not celebrate Christmas for reasons of the history of the 25th of December. It used to be a holiday celebrated to the unknown gods and with time, they added the celebration of Jesus' birth in there. From my stand point on that is that as always, God takes the pre eminence and is exalted above all else. These friends of mine love God probably more than I do. They live for Him and have accepted the free gift of salvation (gift... wonder why we give gifts at Christmas? God continually gives us gifts but Jesus was the best gift of all, to come die in our place because He had NO sin and could pay the debt of sin for us, but we have to reach out and accept the gift of the Saviour; eternal life.)
I have other friends who do Christmas in a different way than we do. Some have trees, some don't.
I say all this for two reasons:
(If you have come to a place in your life were you understood that you are a sinner (person who sins, breaks commandments like not lying, not envying, cursing etc) and you understand and believe that Jesus Christ is the only Son of God and was born of a virgin, lived a sinless life, was tortured, crucified and died on a cross for your sins and that on the third day, as He predicted, rose again and ascended to Heaven with His body. You have confessed the first to God and accepted Jesus' payment for your sins on the cross and asked Him to forgive you and be your personal Saviour, then you are a child of God. You are saved... saved from eternity in hell after your death.)
- If you are a child of God, just love Him with your whole heart, mind, soul and strength. If you are ignorant in how you celebrate His birth, He overlooks that. He sees our sincerity or lack thereof.
- We should read our bible daily so we too can know the scriptures. We'll never know them as well as Jesus did but it will help us make wise decisions and walk an easier path through life.
He cleaned my life up little by little, gave me a wonderful family and is my best friend when I sometimes feel I don't have any that understand.
A- accept that you are a sinner and God is perfect without sin
B- believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and He died on the cross for your sins
C- confess your sins to Him and ask Him to come into your heart and save you.
Merry CHRISTmas
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Are we there yet?
My kids love to read in the van, or to listen to books on tape so, we rarely hear, "Are we there yet???" As for me... God must be tired of listening to me saying it when it comes to my health.
It has been a long time since I've written and mainly it's because with homeschooling, sports, piano and trying to rest, is taking a lot of time out of my day.
Right now, our eldest son is gone to hockey and the three other are in bed sleeping so I have a few minutes to bring you up to date with my "issues".
To back track a bit. In January, I went to see the doctor because I was VERY tired most of the time, almost as if I was pregnant, but I wasn't. He had blood work done and some minor things showed up and he kept an eye on that. In April, I went to Bathurst and experienced dizziness, feeling faint and nauseous. I told my doctor and he sent me for an MRI but it came out fine so we concluded that it was "just" a migraine. The third week of July, I started having ear problems, mainly with the right ear. I thought it was just congestion and let it be. Then August 5th I had my first "attack". The doctor felt the symptoms showed that it must be Vagal which is known as Vaso Vagal, when your Vagus nerve is stimulated by either stress, or something you ate that is not agreeing with you and makes you dizzy, heart rate rise, blood pressure drop and vomiting. He could not guarantee that it would not happen again but what I've often heard is that one Vagal in a persons lifetime is normal. By September 11th, 36 days since my first "Vagal" I had had 5 Vagals. That was not normal. I was scheduled with Peter Ford, a renown Pharmacist, a cardiologist app., a holter for 24 hours, a hearing test and an ultra sound of the heart.
My doctor was convinced that I had liquid behind the eardrum and that was my ear problem. Well.... I had my hearing test yesterday and come to find out, I've lost 40BTU (I think that was the measurement they used) out of 100 of hearing. I knew I could not hear well in that ear! Then they also discovered that that my eardrums are fine, there is no liquid behind it. The problem is in my inner ear. I was told to expect a call from the ear, nose and throat doctor for an app. within the next two weeks at the latest. I got a call the next morning, today, from my doctor asking if I thought I could make it today. I said yes, the specialist called me a few minutes later and by 12pm I was being seen by the specialist. Drum Roll Please! (ha ha that's funny... DRUM... as in ear drum... ha ha... ok... never mind....)
The specialist told me that although my symptoms are similar to Vagals, these do not last 4-5 hours straight and leave you tired like I do. BUT Menière disease does. All the same symptoms but usually last between 4-6 hours and you are exhausted after, needing to rest for several hours after. That floored me to the exactness of the prognosis. Also, this disease is a inner ear problem and causes deafness. So, my ear did have something to do with all this. I found it strange that the only thing that changed since I started these "Vagals" was my ear.
Anyway, things get stranger. My aunt, my mother's sister, has had these same symptoms for almost 2 years now. We are pretty much at the same spot in our doctor/treatment/diagnosis journey. She told me that she couldn't wait to hear what they found with me because that would be what's wrong with her and visa versa with me. Another strange thing is that some believe that Ménière disease is often found within family.
Tomorrow, I have an app. with this specialist. She is going to give me a cortisone shot in the inner ear. ya... ... ... She said that she had to go through the eardrum and that will be painful but the hole will heal itself easily. I couldn't swallow nor talk for 15 minutes. OUF! I was worried about how long I wouldn't be able to talk... LOL
Anyway, I have a link if you want to read more about it. http://www.nidcd.nih.gov/health/balance/meniere.html
That is all for today, since I have some alone time, I'm going to vedge.
"We're almost there! ...."
It has been a long time since I've written and mainly it's because with homeschooling, sports, piano and trying to rest, is taking a lot of time out of my day.
Right now, our eldest son is gone to hockey and the three other are in bed sleeping so I have a few minutes to bring you up to date with my "issues".
To back track a bit. In January, I went to see the doctor because I was VERY tired most of the time, almost as if I was pregnant, but I wasn't. He had blood work done and some minor things showed up and he kept an eye on that. In April, I went to Bathurst and experienced dizziness, feeling faint and nauseous. I told my doctor and he sent me for an MRI but it came out fine so we concluded that it was "just" a migraine. The third week of July, I started having ear problems, mainly with the right ear. I thought it was just congestion and let it be. Then August 5th I had my first "attack". The doctor felt the symptoms showed that it must be Vagal which is known as Vaso Vagal, when your Vagus nerve is stimulated by either stress, or something you ate that is not agreeing with you and makes you dizzy, heart rate rise, blood pressure drop and vomiting. He could not guarantee that it would not happen again but what I've often heard is that one Vagal in a persons lifetime is normal. By September 11th, 36 days since my first "Vagal" I had had 5 Vagals. That was not normal. I was scheduled with Peter Ford, a renown Pharmacist, a cardiologist app., a holter for 24 hours, a hearing test and an ultra sound of the heart.
My doctor was convinced that I had liquid behind the eardrum and that was my ear problem. Well.... I had my hearing test yesterday and come to find out, I've lost 40BTU (I think that was the measurement they used) out of 100 of hearing. I knew I could not hear well in that ear! Then they also discovered that that my eardrums are fine, there is no liquid behind it. The problem is in my inner ear. I was told to expect a call from the ear, nose and throat doctor for an app. within the next two weeks at the latest. I got a call the next morning, today, from my doctor asking if I thought I could make it today. I said yes, the specialist called me a few minutes later and by 12pm I was being seen by the specialist. Drum Roll Please! (ha ha that's funny... DRUM... as in ear drum... ha ha... ok... never mind....)
The specialist told me that although my symptoms are similar to Vagals, these do not last 4-5 hours straight and leave you tired like I do. BUT Menière disease does. All the same symptoms but usually last between 4-6 hours and you are exhausted after, needing to rest for several hours after. That floored me to the exactness of the prognosis. Also, this disease is a inner ear problem and causes deafness. So, my ear did have something to do with all this. I found it strange that the only thing that changed since I started these "Vagals" was my ear.
Anyway, things get stranger. My aunt, my mother's sister, has had these same symptoms for almost 2 years now. We are pretty much at the same spot in our doctor/treatment/diagnosis journey. She told me that she couldn't wait to hear what they found with me because that would be what's wrong with her and visa versa with me. Another strange thing is that some believe that Ménière disease is often found within family.
Tomorrow, I have an app. with this specialist. She is going to give me a cortisone shot in the inner ear. ya... ... ... She said that she had to go through the eardrum and that will be painful but the hole will heal itself easily. I couldn't swallow nor talk for 15 minutes. OUF! I was worried about how long I wouldn't be able to talk... LOL
Anyway, I have a link if you want to read more about it. http://www.nidcd.nih.gov/health/balance/meniere.html
That is all for today, since I have some alone time, I'm going to vedge.
"We're almost there! ...."
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